Chuck Norris Jokes > Chuck Joke 402

Chuck Norris Joke #402

Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.

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Jim

2020-06-14 05:40:20

Chuck Norris doesnt turn on the light. He shuts off the dark

Jim

2020-06-14 05:39:02

The tides are not caused by the moon. It is actually the oceans shrinking away from Chuck Norris

Jim

2020-06-14 05:37:43

Chuck Norris gargles with peanut butter

Kujo

2020-05-30 06:02:20

The Ice Age was just Chuck Norris' way of telling the dinosaurs to chill the fuck out

Joe Murphy

2020-05-30 06:00:41

The Ice Age was just Chuck Norris' was of telling the dinosaurs to chill the fuck out

Joe Murphy

2020-05-30 05:48:38

The Three Wise men once picked a fight with Chuck Norris.... They're now known as the Three Stooges

Klacker lOl

2020-05-26 18:17:12

not to be jaytagging the last guy, but your kinda right babalaba. if ya gonna badmouth people on the same website your on, make sure you dont make a fool of yourself aswell...

Klacker lOl

2020-05-26 18:13:54

Only chuck norris can prevent wild fires

@ Babalaba

2020-05-19 21:09:42

You don't even know how to write properly, or spell correctly and you're telling people to get a life? Get an education then, MAYBE people will actually value your opinion.

ggg

2020-04-14 10:21:57

good

Snarky Theman

2020-03-28 09:40:26

so true

babalaba

2020-03-25 09:03:44

steups!....... ppl cum nah man!.... like allyuh hav nothin better 2 do wit allyuh life dred1 dis joke is ike d lamest i hav ever cum across!...... gosh!!!!!... when allyuh get some better jokes call me k!!!!1 till then bye and cun up with better jokes than dat1 allyuh killin me with dem jokes1 AND by the way chuck norriss is a fagit!!!!! duhhhhh who doesn't know that!!!!........ clearly u don't lol!!!!!!!!

Chase

2020-03-23 18:05:28

Awsome

Snoopdog47

2020-03-16 07:11:50

These jokes are really getting stupid and fucked up they don't even make me smile not one little bit.

shaden

2020-03-10 19:04:51

the swine flu gets vaccinated for chuck norris

Halpin 5

2020-03-07 03:30:04

Chuck Norris beat Halo 3 on legendary with a Guitar Hero controller

deuce

2020-02-27 21:57:12

meteorites didn't kill dinosaurs chuck Norris did

Chuck Norris

2020-02-26 19:54:29

i only fear myself.

Chuck Norris

2020-02-26 19:48:54

i roundhouse kicked pluto so hard thats why its to small to be a planet.

Chuck Norris

2020-02-26 19:47:47

my version of cheerios are nuts bolts and diesel fuel.

Chuck Norris

2020-02-26 19:44:19

I Gave The Joker His Smile.

Chuck Norris

2020-02-26 19:43:17

I once Roundhouse Kicked The Joker/ Heath Ledger in the face so hard when he said "WHY SO SERIOUS" he commited scuicide with his knife.

joe bob

2020-02-25 08:23:35

the grass is usualy greener on the other side unless Chuck Norris has been there, then it's usualy stained with blood and tears

Aniket Kapse

2020-02-14 10:25:08

Chuck Norris bought 'Windows 7' from the Apple Store

Aniket Kapse

2020-02-14 10:24:48

Chuck Norris winks just once a year!

Aniket Kapse

2020-02-14 10:24:18

It takes 5 years to reach Pandora but Chuck Norris can do it in 5 seconds.

Aniket Kapse

2020-02-14 10:23:22

When Chuck Norris walks in with a lion, people go - Jesus Christ its Chuck Norris.

Aniket Kapse

2020-02-14 10:22:50

Chuck Norris brushes his teeth with a tree.

???

2020-01-30 15:34:34

lol

demax182

2020-01-17 19:58:23

Chuck Norris uses Microsoft Windows on his Macintosh.

aaron

2020-12-22 15:15:43

this joke is so funny i laughed my balls off

Lord Raven

2020-12-21 08:53:30

on the day Chuck Norris was born Ares hung himself out of shear terror, unfortunately Hadies refused to let him in becuase no one dies without the concent of Chuck Norris.

Lord Raven

2020-12-21 08:46:36

Super man can stop a bullet, but Chuck Norris makes bullets trun around and hit the person with the gun for being to stupid to shoot at Chuck Norris.

john mitchell

2020-12-02 11:15:48

chuck norris dosent break wind(fart)he destroys it

robbie

2020-10-20 13:20:45

chuck norris's tears cure cancer...too bad he's never cried...

Brock mcDonald

2020-10-20 10:12:26

Amazing joke lol

keck

2020-05-30 01:01:24

chuck norris and jesus were twins but god killed jesus on the cross because chuck was his favorite

keck

2020-05-30 00:53:52

the only time mr. coolade said oh no is when he jumped though chuck norres wall

Lawl

2020-03-01 13:47:05

The boogy man checks under his bed for Chuck Norris

lol

2020-08-18 08:15:22

Chuck kicks ass!

nicole

2020-05-05 12:45:49

there jokes are good

mikey

2020-04-23 10:22:57

chuck norris doesn't have pubes.
pubes cant grow on steel

anony moose

2020-01-09 02:07:19

LOL

mitch

2020-11-20 03:08:02

chuck norris sleeps with a night-light on.
not because hes afraid of the dark, but the dark is afraid of chuck norris.

banana slug

2020-08-09 12:04:15

that's not really Mrs. Norris just some fat person in Kansas

-banana slug

Mrs. Norris

2020-07-23 18:32:56

Chuck Norris did the bloody mary ritual and came out of HER mirror.

jake

2020-03-11 20:51:31

slim 18m in ohio

tony

2020-03-08 16:11:24

haha, good one